The Bachelor: First Impressions

Once upon a time, before I had a baby, I blogged about things other than said baby or being a mom. Important things, like travel, drinking, and The Bachelor.

From what I hear, my former Bachelor blogs were a crowd favorite, so as a special treat in 2016, I've decided to BRING BACK THE BACHELOR RECAPS!

Without further adieu, let's get down to it, starting with this season's Bachelor, Ben Higgins. Also known as Peter Brady. (seriously though.)

Note: I am obviously not the first person to come up with this likeness. A Google search for "Peter Brady" generated several already-created side-by-side images of Ben and Peter. Photo Cred

A young Bachelor at just 26 (which indicates he will have women younger than him, which promises craziness and immaturity, which guarantees an awesome season), Ben is cute, wholesome, and seems funny enough without being TOO cheesy.

I did like him on Kaitlin's season, though I was a little surprised to know he was chosen as The Bachelor. I'm REALLY hoping he is more likeable and interesting than The Farmer. I will say, the self-deprecation about being unworthy of love? C'mon.

The limo entrances did not disappoint on the scale of weird, awkward, slutty and crazy. We had everything from a mini horse to a strange gal with a bangin' bod wearing a giant rose on her head, complete with the invitation to pollinate her flower later.

I challenged myself to come up with just one word to describe each girl by jotting down the first thing that came to my mind when they exited:

  1. Lauren B.: Likeable
  2. Caila: Cheesey
  3. Mandi: Psycho
  4. Jubilee: Badass
  5. Haley and Emily, Twins: Yuck
  6. Amanda: Helium
  7. Tiara: Chicken
  8. Samantha: Cakeface
  9. Lace: Crazy
  10. Lauren R.: Stalker
  11. Shushanna: What?
  12. Leah: Twerk
  13. Joelle "JoJo": YES
  14. Lauren H.: Sad
  15. Laura: Shy
  16. Maegan: Masculine
  17. Jami: Funny
  18. Breanne: Carbs
  19. Izzy: No
  20. Rachel: Unemployed
  21. Jessica: Eyes
  22. Lauren "LB": Droopy
  23. Jackie: No
  24. Olivia: Hi
  25. Amber: Again?
  26. Becca: Gorgeous
  27. Jennifer: Meh

One word for these ladies was SUPER hard. For so many of them, I needed two to four words, like "No way," or "What the fuck?" or "That bitch is cray."

As the cocktail party went on, I found it difficult not to go back and revise my chosen words, but I restrained myself. I found that for a few ladies that gave a bad first impression out of the limo, they redeemed themselves in the cocktail hour. JoJo, for example, the chick with the Unicorn head? Loved her.  Or Leah, the girl who basically showed her EVERYTHING bending over to hike a football? Didn't hate her, either.

Then we had the crazies who showed their crazy from beginning to end. I'm talkin to you, Lace and Mandi. The Rose Ceremony proved to me that this show is rigged. There is no way, NO WAY, that someone like Ben would pick Mandi or Lace over some of the girls he got rid of. NO WAY.

All in all, we've got our token players for the season. The drama queens, the bitches, the all-american good girls, the mom, etc.

After tonight's viewing, my Initial Final Four Picks:

1. Olivia
2. JoJo
3. Leah
4. Caila

What did everyone else think of the episode?

PS - Forgive my lack of witty humor. I'm warming up and getting back into the swing of things! :)

1 comment:

  1. Seriously. I always wanted to believe in the show especially after seeing Sean Lowe and he saying that it is his choice but who would keep someone around you gave you a mini dentist appointment? Lame.

    Oh yea I think Olivia is staying for a while. I think Becca might too. I loved his face when he saw her.


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